


Christmas Mug

by SpiderWolf



Series: The Happy Peter Chronicles [1]
Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: BAMF Peter Parker, Fluff, Gen, Holidays
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-22
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2019-02-18 15:50:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13103481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpiderWolf/pseuds/SpiderWolf
Summary: Peter gets distracted on his way to see Happy.





	Christmas Mug

Spider-Man has stopped a lot of muggings in the last eleven months he’s existed. So much so, that the number of them has dropped drastically, and he’s only seen one in the last month, despite it being Christmas time. The newspapers thank Spider-Man for the drop in crime, and it feels pretty damn good.

But Peter Parker hasn’t stopped anything. He’s a scrawny high school student that competes with the triathlon, excels in science and technology, and spends a lot of time building Lego sets with his best-friend. Peter Parker doesn’t have super-powers, so when he sees trouble, he runs in the opposite direction. Spider-Man is a local hero. Peter Parker is just another face in the crowd; a face that, on this particular Christmas Eve, is on his way to rendezvous with Happy Hogan, and of course he’s running late.

Peter pauses between two businesses to check his phone messages, and send a hasty text to Happy. He doesn’t want to be left behind since tonight is the Avengers Christmas party. Just thinking about missing it raises the hairs on his arms.

_“Light a fire under your ass and hurry.”_

_“Language.”_ Peter replies with a quirked smile.

His mood drastically changes a second later, when something solid and cold presses into his lower back just beneath the waist band of his jacket. A gravelly voice orders him to enter the alley beside them, and his heart sinks. Spider-Man might have dealt with it then and there, but Peter Parker is… more or less, impotent, so he obeys and allows the armed thug to corral him away from the hustle and bustle of the main street and into the shadows of two tall brick buildings.

He tries to get a proper look at the man, but is thrown face-first into the side of one of them. It’s a stinging blow, but what he’s most concerned with is losing all the presents in his backpack. As it’s tugged down his arm, he panics and breaks his own rule, by elbowing the man in the gut. He just barely holds back. The man stumbles with his gun still in hand, and Peter brings his bag around to knock it to the ground. Without waiting, he ducks and sweeps the man’s legs out from beneath him.

He lands hard on his back and grunts. “Christ! What the hell are you? A ninja or something?!”

Peter stands over him with his belongings clutched against his chest. “What are _you_ supposed to be? The Grinch?”

The mugger glares up at him with pure contempt. The feeling is mutual. “Oh you’re going to regret messing with me!”

Peter catches him eyeing his gun, and quickly kicks it away. But his spider-sense spikes a moment later and he side-steps just as the man lunges; letting him smack into the wall behind him. A flash of steel reveals a knife when the mugger swings wide, and it guts Peter’s backpack; spilling his modest collection of wrapped presents all over the alley floor. He cries out in dismay.

“Hold still you little punk! I’ll gut you!”

Spider-Man might quip here, but Peter Parker can’t afford to delay; he’s got Christmas plans. He steps into the next attack and catches both knife and hand in his backpack straps, and twists hard; disarming the man for a second time. He stuffs the bag over the mugger’s head and webs him to the wall.

“Gee, thanks Spider-Man!” Peter calls up at the empty sky. As far as cover-ups go, it’s pretty lame, but somehow it works. The mugger swears and kicks uselessly against his bindings; completely blind. “What a cool super hero.” Peter adds with a smirk.

“God dammit! Screw you, Spider-Man!”

“Language.” Peter warns as he shoulders out of his jacket. He piles the presents on top of it, and wraps them up; securing them with knotted sleeves. He stands up and holds them close.

“Please kid, come on! It’s Christmas!”

Peter snorts as he walks by. “Sorry, but I can't take you seriously with that bag over your head.”

A plethora of unsavory words are flung back at him, but once he’s returned to the main strip, and is surrounded by noisy shoppers, he no longer hears nor cares. Doing his civic duty, he walks up to a beat cop standing nearby and clears his throat. “Excuse me, sir. There’s a guy webbed to a wall down that alley.” He points at it and tries to look extra concerned. “He said something about Spider-Man tossing his gun in the garbage.”

The officer’s eyes go wide and he thanks Peter before rushing past. Peter watches him disappear around the corner and actually feels pretty good about it; all things considered. But then he remembers why he acted so rashly, and quickly tugs his phone out to stare at Happy’s latest message.

_“I’m leaving in two minutes.”_

Right.

Peter runs the rest of the way, fairly certain he’s missed the two minutes mark, but when he gets to the pick-up point, Happy is still waiting for him outside a bodega with his fancy black town-car and Peter climbs into the backseat with his messy bundle.

“You ever hear of a watch? Or a bag?”

Peter shrugs stiffly as he buckles in; worrying about the shape of everything. He spent a lot of time picking his presents out, and wrapping was not easy. The idea of losing or breaking anything is distressing.

Happy glances at him in the rear-view mirror. “Are you okay?”

Peter sighs deeply. “Y-yeah, I’m sorry that I’m late.”

Happy pulls out into traffic and gets them on their way without replying, and Peter sullenly stares out his window. He feels like going home, but Happy already wasted so much time waiting, that there is no way Peter can do that to him. In fact, he has a present for him, too; so long as it survived the ordeal. He loosens his jacket sleeves and pulls them back to reveal a dismal semi-damp pile of wrapped boxes. His wallet and keys are there too. Thank god. It would have been embarrassing to leave them hanging off the mugger’s face. Happy’s gift looks relatively unharmed, but two others have swipe marks from the knife attack. Of course they are the ones for Mister Stark and Miss Potts.

“You’re pretty quiet tonight.” Happy observes. “I thought you were looking forward to the party.”

Peter forces himself to smile at Happy in the mirror. “I am… I just… well, I dropped all my stuff and now it's pretty messed up.”

“Did you fall on them? Because you have a little…” Happy makes a gesture, and Peter notices he has a scuffed forehead.

Annoyed, he wipes the dried blood away and probes the skin beneath it. It’s already healed. “I uh… yeah. I guess..?”

“You guess?”

Peter gropes for a more succinct answer; one that will satisfy Happy’s curiosity, but the thought of lying on Christmas eve doesn’t sit well with him. He sighs deeply and waves his hand around weakly. “Some guy tried to mug me on my way here.”

“You got mugged?” Happy’s voice raises an octave. “Who the hell mugs Spider-Man?” The disbelief in Happy’s voice is enough to bring a real smile to Peter’s face.

“Well, they didn’t. They attacked me. But it’s fine. I stuck my bag over his head and webbed him to a wall. He thinks Spider-Man showed up and helped, so really… there’s nothing to worry about.”

“Except for the bag.” Happy says pointedly. What was with him and the bag?

“Yeah. Except for that.”

“So how’d it get wrecked?” Of course there’d be the question of how everything ended up on the ground.

“It got ripped during the scuffle; no biggie. It’s not the first time I’ve lost one. Actually, I think it’s the ninth since the start of my school year. Aunt May is keeping count.”

“Well,” Happy says at great length, “it seems to me, you have a fairly good excuse.”

“Yeah, I guess. I got you something, too.” Peter says; holding up a four inch box wrapped in shiny golden paper. “I think it’s okay.”

“Kid. You really shouldn’t have.” There’s a flash of guilt in the older man’s eyes. Peter isn’t surprised; just disappointed that he doesn’t feel like he deserves anything. When reflecting upon everything that’s happened since they met in May; it’s impossible not to feel some sort of attachment to the man.

“I know, but I wanted to, soooo…”

“You’re insufferable.”

He laughs. “I like you too, Happy.”

When they pull up at the Avengers compound, Peter gathers his things and slips out of the car. He pauses beside Happy’s door, and waits until the window is rolled down so he can hand him his present. “Merry Christmas, Happy.”

Happy stares at the present like it’s an explosive. “Um, yeah. You too.”

With a wave, Peter heads inside with his mess, but pauses just inside to watch Happy unwrap the coffee mug he bought for him. The older man shakes his head in a slow, endearing sort of way, as he reads the words on it out loud. Peter can’t hear him, but he doesn’t have to, because he’s the one who picked it out.

_'This job is my Kobyashi Maru.'_

Grinning proudly, Peter marches away.

**

Three Days later, he receives a Spider-Man backpack in the mail, and knows exactly who is to thank for it.

**Author's Note:**

> I am not sorry for my shameless love for Star Trek. Happy just strikes me as a closeted fan of the original show.
> 
> Also there is no mention of Aunt May because of reasons. HA! Lets just say she’s working a double shift.
> 
> Thank you for reading all of this! I plan on adding more Happy Peter fics as soon as I get the chance (I’m old fashioned and still write most of my stuff on paper).
> 
> Lotsa love,  
> Spiderwolf


End file.
